LaughMaur

Mommy C:

I hear a lot of people saying that you can’t remain fit during the Shelter In Place. But they clearly have not met Squeaky (Carryover baby name . . . sorry future girlfriends). Let’s face it, he lives where the first shutdowns began so he may know a thing or two. And all 10 yr olds clearly have this mindset, right?!

Squeaky On Being Fit . . .

Staying fit is keeping your brain and body on track to become successful in life. A lot of people maybe do just reading because they like it . . . me too. Sometimes I read to stay fit to keep my brain active. Some people try to stay fit only with their bodies. But if you do only that you won’t be able to do somethings as well as others that have kept their brain on track. Like being on a sports team . . . failing in school work . . . then you get suspended from the team. And people that only try to stay fit with their brains may find it harder to do other things like PE.

Squeaky Body Fitness . . .

I try to do body workouts most days . . . You Tube soccer player workouts . . . full body weight sessions . . . yoga. Then I take it outside doing cardio workouts like running the neighborhood, playing soccer and walking the dog. We can’t forget the dance classes which are also a good cardio workout. These are, of course, best done with those you might be sheltering in place with . . . like dance workouts when your Dad can’t dance . . . lots of laughs. Another part of keeping your body fit is eating healthy like quinoa (made by myself) . . . hard-boiled eggs breakfasts and lots of vegetables and fruit.

Squeaky Mind Fitness . . .

I always read before bed which has been a habit of mine for a while. So far I have finished 4 books. . . at least 312 pages each with the longest book being 514 pages. I do all my assignments for school. I have learned to not always call on my dad for help for all subjects. My mom gives me some extra things to help boost my brain . . . learning to speak Spanish . . . building a marble run out of cardboard throughout the house. I am learning other new things on virtual field trips and art lessons . . . exploring many different things that I may be interested in. My cooking and baking have been taken up a notch . . . making family breakfast at least once a week . . . lunch every so often and helping make dinner.

So it’s about staying fit . . . BOTH Body and Mind . . . just like in my “real life."

Walking has always been my get out of life card. No matter where I go throwing on a pair of my favorite walkers can put a little distance between me and life. . . work, kids, bills or whatever is going on. The solitude and relentless motion always settle the monkeys in my head. Well that’s all changed in the last few weeks.

Now that solitary path has quite a few other folks. I enjoy sharing the beautiful forest preserve that I live in. Here’s just a few notes to help survive the walking wilderness . . .

Makeup is not required . . really nobody cares if you wear lipstick, eyeshadow or majic marker. Combing your hair . . . optional.

Although clothing is a must . . . nobody cares if you’re wearing Lulemon leggings or the Walmart blue light specials.

Cell phone should be used with great caution. I know you are anxious to show OUTSIDE to everyone on Zoom but perhaps a quick selfie might work.

Love the dogs joining in on the family fun . . . but if Petey has already walked 10 times today please make sure he naps OFF the walking path.

Finally walkers are experts at social distancing. If you get a nod or a smile, that’s our way of saying “Welcome to the Club”. Enjoy . . .

I have been hesitant to continue with my blog given the epic condition of our world. My concern is that someone might take my mission to LaughMaur as not really a right time right place thing. This is indeed a tumultuous time with no one escaping the surreal living.

Thinking perhaps now more than ever we all need to pause and maybe even dig deep to find a smile or even a smirk in our now. So going to blog on . . . Feel free to share your LaughMaur moments with me at LaughMaur@gmail.com.

ME: Aren’t you glad that we still have one another?

HIM: Yeah I don’t like coming home to nobody.

ME: Well if you just need to have someone waiting for you . . . maybe a cat or dog would do.

HIM: WHAT? How are you going to misconstrue that statement?

ME: MISCONSTRUE? MISCONSTRUE? That’s not a word I have ever heard you use in the thousands of years that I have known you.

HIM: Why do you always have to overthink everything?

ME: Good thing I'm not one of those high maintenance gals.

Next day HIM giving me a BROWN BAG with this in it.

Much better than flowers. . . not going to overthink that one!

If the sock fits…wear it

People watching is one of my favorite things to do. It’s real time Netflix. You can binge watch for hours and nobody cares. The best is that it is absolutely FREE. After a crazy amount of holiday gatherings I have decided nobody can provide more entertainment than … THAT PERSON.

Party Scene: You just got back from spending some time on the West Coast with first hand experience of the Wild Fires. You share your angst and concerns while talking to the group. THAT PERSON interjects that it is no biggie pontificating that statistically your chance of dying is one out of 1 million. WHAT??

Family Scene: Family member was so excited to cook their first Thankgiving turkey. The turkey was lovingly brined and stuffed. Perplexed about the proper cooking time THAT PERSON spoke up and stated a cooking time of 2.5 hours with the conviction of Julie Child and Emeril Lagasse. Fast forward to all the family sitting around the beautiful table scape complete with piping hot sides . . . and the first slice of the turkey just about gobbled. WHAT??

Most of these folks are outgoing and friendly with no mean bone in their body. The consistency of the I-know-it-all attitude can be maddening especially if they are in the family circle. You see THAT PERSON is just making s@$t up with an uncanny sense that they are a card carrying member of MENSA. They are so good that you usually don’t know what’s up . . . until you have cut into that not so cooked turkey.

I decided this year to do something to acknowledge this madness . . . and gift these to THAT PERSON.

Not sure if THAT PERSON got it! But hey if the socks fit . . .wear them!

Girl stuff has been a life long puzzle to me. My feet didn’t fit into the “stay at home and raise the kids” shoes. I chose a career in a male dominated industry where my girl stuff was definitely not in the script. Always a challenge but I think I’ve figured it out..

ME: My Lead Engineer just told me HE doesn’t do boring customer meetings ever. I am trying to plan my Dad’s 65^th birthday party, complete a home bath renovation project and get my career defining $125M national project delivered on time tomorrow. Help!

The Thinker/Talker: Want to come over for a glass of wine tonight? WE can catch up about what’s going on.

The Adventurer: How about WE fly to Paris for the weekend?

The Planner: Send me a copy of your time manager and WE will figure this out together.

***

The Thinker/Talker: It’s only 7:30AM and the bottle of pinot is calling my name.

ME: How about I come over and WE can talk about what’s going on?

The Adventurer: I can’t fly to Paris the airfares are crazy!

ME: I have a buddy pass WE can use!

The Planner: Why can’t these crazy people just follow the F @$&% plan?

ME: Walk me thru your F@$&% plan and let's see if WE can simplify?

****

ME: I want to write a blog called LaughMaur.

The Thinker/Talker: I think that’s a great idea . . . do it!

The Adventurer: My bags are packed and ready to go wherever . . . do it!

The Planner: Can I help with your social media . . . do it!

Spending some family celebratory time on the SoCal coastline. Time here always gives my monkey mind a rest... or maybe I just feel part of the circus they call Cali life. Visiting the sea lions does not disappoint.

Who gets to lay around on the beach all day with maybe 100s of their closest BFFs without a care in the world? SEA LIONS DO. They seem not to care WHAT...doctor, lawyer or Indian Chief WHO ... race, religious creed or gender identity... or WAY their BFFS are.... size, eye color, whisker length. They don’t care that the warm body next to them STINKS LIKE A 500 LB ELEPHANT. They spend lots of time snuggling and loving on each other.

The roar is their language. (SEA LION right?) You know that how’s they let the other guy know “NOT TONIGHT I HAVE HEADACHE TONIGHT" or "YOU BE SNORING TOO LOUD". Lots of seals so must be lots of SEXY TIME.

At times the roar is loud like ... I WANT TO REMOVE A BODY PART mean. Nobody really seems to pay attention. Everybody gets to ROAR whatever but the snuggling goes on and on. There are no WCW events, Social Media Shaming or any political angst. There is some fin smacking . . . love tap or NOT? If the roaring gets too much, you just move on to the next love group. A mother nature version of the Hallmark movie with a "Love the One Your With" sound score.

I laugh and laugh . . . turning my back to the ocean and sea lions heading back to the circus. SILLY HUMANS.

I am a simple gal who doesn't do complicated time consuming things very well. KISS ( Keep It Stupid Silly) has been my life mantra. Hopefully simple task list results in great results.

My minimal attitude regarding makeup or some would say lack thereof is very reflective. When in my late teens, a waitress during a dinner with my Dad asked him if his wife (yes ME) would like a drink. I thought "Wow, my Dad is so young looking they think he is married to an almost twenty year old." YES . . . I did miss the whole other side of that story. So I jumped on to the familial trait of looking younger than you are train. Perhaps not so true. . .

Over the years the basics have stayed the same: clean the face, all natural foundation, eyeshadow, blush and mascara (yes still Covergirl!). The goal always being to look "natural" . . . WELL LIKE MY FACE.

So one day I notice my eyeshadow is disappearing. Not a biggie but still perplexing. A brief consult with the cosmetic store consultant (THOSE stores give me anxiety) I purchased something called Eyeshadow Primer. . . like the concept of covering a wine color wall gone bad. Pretty clever huh?

Yesterday during my morning makeup ritual, I see the words "ANTI-AGING" in small print on the tube. Immediately I look at my eyelids for wrinkles, blink lines or whatever else might indicate "AGING." I see nothing but my normal always somewhat droopy eyelids. A Google search reveals that those eyelids are indeed considered AGING ... something that I noticed when I was fifteen. Makes sense to me and I have INDEED been aging. SERIOUSLY . . . what is that all about?

I looked at that crazy little tube and laughed... and laughed.